Wednesday, December 23, 2009

The Twelve Days of the Campaign

The Twelve Days of the Campaign.ogg The Twelve Days of the Campaign.mp3 (live demo - piano)
This is a ghost Song Fu; one of the things they were looking for this year was a Winter Holiday song that's not about the holidays. I'm thinking this one probably wouldn't meet the challenge on technical grounds. This is more of a parody than a brand new song, but nevertheless here it is. I also am a little late on my self-imposed deadline, but thought better of it when I realized that I'm not actually competing, had some other obligations, and had already done a YouTube vid and penned a Biography of a Song this week. Combined with my revised Jolly Old Saint Nicholas, this comprises the extent of my holiday songs for this season.

For those that aren't familiar with Dungeons & Dragons, the Dungeon Master (“DM”) is sort of the author and game referee. This is a conversation between me ("D") and my son Timothy ("T") (originally Will was going to do it, but Tim volunteered for the meager bribe of being allowed to open a Christmas present early).

The Twelve Days of the Campaign
dave & will leigh
D: Tim, let me tell you about this D&D campaign I'm in.
T: Is it good?
D: Yeah, it's great!
T: Well tell me about it! [music starts] Wait a minute? It's musical?
D: Yep.
On the FIRST day of the campaign my DM gave to me
A Deck of Many Things!
T: Isn't that a lot?
D: Not really.
On the SECOND day of the campaign my DM gave to me
Two spider gloves
and a Deck of Many Things!
T: Don't you mean gloves of spider climbing?
D: yeah, but that doesn't scan.
On the THIRD day of the campaign my DM gave to me
Three chain mail armor
Two spider gloves
and a Deck of Many Things!
T: You do know that's three Decks of Many Things so far, right?
D: Yeah. So?
On the FOURTH day of the campaign my DM gave to me
Four bags of loot
Three chain mail armor
Two spider gloves
And a Deck of Many Things!
T: OK, I sense a pattern. How bout we cut this Monty Haul campaign short. Just skip to the end.
D: you sure?

T: Yep
D: OK.
On the TWELFTH day of the campaign my DM sent at me
Twelve Chromatic Dragons!
Eleven Lich Lords!
T: what!
Ten Cyclops Fighters!
T: say again?
Nine Cave Trolls!
Eight Red Beholders!
T: now wait just a minute!
Seven Hill Giants!
Six Angry Orcs!
FIVE UNDEAD THINGS!
T: Aw, come ON!
Four bags of loot
Three chain mail armor
Two spider gloves
And a Deck of Many Things!
T: you suck.

2 comments:

JoeCovenant said...

Hey Dave!
Why is the bitrate of the MP3s so low??

Dave Leigh said...

Because the quality of the performance doesn't rate anything better? Or because I wanted to keep the filesize down? Or because I don't know jack about digital recording and treat this box as if it were a glorified tape recorder, using just the defaults?

Take your pick of whatever paints me in the best or worst light according to your preference.

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